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Spiders

Trimark // R // October 9, 2001
List Price: $14.99 [Buy now and save at Amazon]

Review by G. Noel Gross | posted December 18, 2001 | E-mail the Author
CineSchlock-O-Rama
Short Takes

Wry humor punctuates this gooey farce with the familiar monster-on-the-loose pace of 1950s creature epics. A student journalist with a Fox Mulder-complex attempts to infiltrate an Area 51-type base with her photographer and computer whiz in tow. Meanwhile, orbiting the earth, the space shuttle is hit by a solar flare during an experiment with a very SPECIAL spider. After a fiery crash, Marci (Lana Parrilla) and pals wind up playing hide-and-go-eat in the underground base with a two-foot tarantula that doubles in size every time they squish it, until it gets to the point where the thing clambers atop a tall building like a certain value-sized primate. Director Gary Jones is no stranger to the genre as he made Mosquito (penned by Leatherface himself, Gunnar Hansen) -- not to be confused with Skeeter, which is a COMPLETELY different movie about giant blood-sucking insects. No breasts. 19 corpses. Phony electrocution gag. Egg-laying closeup. Projectile puking. Spidervision. The script is intentionally littered with lines from other flicks: "I'll be back!" "I've got a bad feeling about this!" and "We're sure as s@#% not in Kansas anymore!" Highly Recommended.

2000, 93 minutes, Widescreen (1.85:1), Outstanding featurette, Trailers.

Also available in the Creature Features boxed set with Crocodile, King Cobra and Octopus.

Check out CineSchlock-O-Rama
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G. Noel Gross is a Dallas graphic designer and avowed Drive-In Mutant who specializes in scribbling B-movie reviews. Noel is inspired by Joe Bob Briggs and his gospel of blood, breasts and beasts.
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